Original Artwork – Barrel of Schlorps & The Purpled Leg

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Barrel of Schlorps
Despite the orthographic shortcomings of its proprietor (it’s shloorp, not shlorp), a former broccodile hunter and compatriot of Blue Hiney named Theezabold Chlump, Barrel of Shlorps is a pretty nippy pad. While not as bitchin’ as the neighboring Guzz, it still sports a rompin’ dance floor with house music perfromed by Nutcrusher’s Catarrhic Choir, a brain-pounding all horc a capella group from Borf. Peeps may come here for the tunes but they stick around for the eats. Theezabold’s excellent staff of chefs and serving wenches are ready to stuff your craw with everything from pickled yucksuckler wangs to shredded smelf hat salad served in a fried schnooble bladder. The braised broccodile loin with pureed swamp crumps and clarified glunge butter was recently ranked number three on Toucanacondor Flaminguez’s list of Floom’s Top Twelve Things To Put In Your Mouth.
From The Whole Hole Volume 01: Keister Island

 

The Purpled Leg

Ample the Auberginator, a werm with disputed origins, opened this grub stand next to the Dung Heap a few years ago. The building used to be the workshop of Huful Duful, a weirdo who vanished under mysterious circumstances, but now Ample uses it to sell tasty, tasty legs. Ample’ll peddle the legs of anything, but for some reason only legs and always purpled. The purpling process is a closely-guarded secret, know only to Ample and one or two of his chums. It doesn’t seem to do much, flavor-wise, but it does indeed turn legs purple. It also turns tongues purple, which is part of the prestige of eating here. The logic goes thusly: anybody who would pay top clam for mediocre food served next to a gigantic pile of mud and muck, just so he can prove he did it, must have clams to burn. Purple tongues and lips are all the rage in the Snoot, where such status symbols seem to be more important than elsewhere.
From The Whole Hole Volume 01: Keister Island

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Weight 6 oz

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